​I do not claim to be
Perfectly adjusted
All together
Well balanced
Or even
Completely sane,
But I am
A creature who lives
For the word behind my name.
I live for love.
I have survived
More than most should see ~
(In one life time
At least)
And I have lived
Wild and recklessly…
I do not claim
To know exactly
What I am doing
Where I am going
Or what will happen next,
And I am not perfectly satisfied
With this life I have
At present
Who is?
But I make my choices
Good or bad
Healthy or not
Logical, sound
Or utterly foolish,
I make my choices
Based on the word behind my name.
I make my choices for love.
And in a world of people
Who every single day
Make choices for the sake of fear
Choosing what I love
Over all
At all times
It has to mean something.

~Charity

​​The darkness passed
The morning arrived
And I wonder why must we learn
By traveling through night?
Is it a choice?
I hear your voice,
It is nearer than ever this time
Like a word in my ear
Like a breath on my neck
You say, “wait for me I’m close”
And I do
Of course I do,
I always have
I wait for you.
​
Charity

​​​I
cannot deny
that
which moves me.
In my blood
You are ~
the shiver that runs
through me
from fingertip to toe
wherever I go.
You are.

Charity

 I did not know at the time
but I had fallen in love.
The kind of love that makes you tremble
under your skin
from a place further within
than you realized existed inside you
before then.

The kind of love that feels like the deepest breath
you could take in your life.
Like that first breath of air
after you dive
deep into the water
and swim further under
than you ever meant to go
and your air is running low
and you realize too late
that there is not enough breath left
for the return trip.
So you shoot for the surface of the water
you can barely see the sun
for a minute you think you'll never arrive
you see images of your life
passing rapidly through your mind
and then suddenly
there you are -
You’ve emerged once again
into the world of oxygen.
You're above the water
free of impending death
free of the cold dark pressure
that would have taken you under
and from this world forever.

And that is when you take the deepest breath

The fullest, strongest breath
that you have taken in your life. 
Your chest expands 
and your throat feels tight
as you nearly choke on the air
you are drinking in
so greedily
so hungry just to breathe and breathe
so intensely thrilled to be alive.

That's what
this love feels like.

That first breath so strong
after nearly losing your life.
It stops me in my step some times
and takes me far away
from everything
that I can see in front of me,
and this love
it causes me
to shiver, shudder, quiver
from head to toe.
I lose all thought
and only know
that I am more alive
for that one sacred meeting 
with a person who
​would teach me
a new perception of love
that would ultimately
change my life forever.

Charity

​6/19/2014

​Skies Thoughts and Signs
Sometimes I lay awake at night and think about you and when I will see you again.
I will wrap my arms around your neck
Press my body deeply into yours and just breathe you in.
It doesn't matter if it is a public place
An airport or a train car.

I will see you, you will smile
My eyes will tear up
Then I will cross the space left between us
The space that has spanned life times
And beyond ...
I am so finished with the space between us...
You will take my hand as I get close
So I don't hesitate in disbelief that you are finally standing there before me,
And then I will wrap my arms around your neck
And hold you till I'm sure that you are made of flesh and blood
And we exist together for once
In the same realm, the same world, the same place in time... after all
After all this time.
It's been too long my love.
I am tired of waiting, I am finished looking,
I have hoped and been wrong once too much
You're on your own now in this hunt
For the one
I give up...
If you're half the man that I know you to be
You'll find me regardless.
And then when you see me across the room
You will call me near to you
With that smile
I have seen in more dreams than I can count
And you’ll let me hold you
Press my body against you long enough
To be sure
That you are made of
Flesh and blood
And the skies, thoughts and signs have guided us
Into each other’s arms once more.

​Charity

love is the elixir that she bathes in
dances, dreams and aches in.
the ancient magic
that stirs in her
the dew on the grass
the wisp of a cloud
that travels past,
lives is this girl
that you desire
but can never
fully grasp
as
she is the one
that soars in a dream
back to her sleeping body
soundly within
the lines
and rhymes of poetry
she is
the divine
awakened mystery
sublime
enchanting
outside of time
she is the distant desire 
in your mind
for what you would have
never planned
and cannot understand

just take a breath
and take her hand

trust that all is well
and you will not utterly lose yourself
to a girl
who bathes in the well 
of love.

You'll only lose yourself
just enough
to find
what distant inside
You always knew
you wanted

from the beginning.


Charity

I turn up the volume
to mask the thought of you
that will not stop
if this is love then there must be
a very thin line
between love
and insanity ~
as it cannot be
 sane
well balanced 
or healthy
to think of anything
or anyone
the way I do 

of you,
so I turn up the volume
close my eyes
fade into the liquid voice of a girl
as my body slips
into the deliciousness
of sleep
and I breathe
while I touch the edge of a 
half waking dream
and picture the galaxy
swirling around this world in my head 
that you have become.

Charity

​

AND SHE LOVED HIM FOR IT
3/31/2014
​
She could see him
his truth
his art
she could see through the broken parts
through the darkness
and to the light
that he carried deep inside
and she loved him for it.


Charity

Nothing changes for me
as I reside inside
another shimmering night
the day comes and goes
and it takes me through
it's practiced methods 
of surviving this life,
but then evening
saunters in
with a swirl of her colored cape 
splashing the sky with golden pink light
teasing the world
with a dizzying breath of beauty
just before night
and here I reside
inside
a peaceful thought of you
inside a luxurious tune.
I take a breath
and pick up my pen again
I like my alone
I like my longing
I like my wandering
I like hiding out in a book
I do
and I like this sheet of paper
and the way it invites my heart
to reveal every desire that I would never dare say
with my two lips aloud.
And here I am again
at days end again
residing alone inside
of another shimmering night.


Charity
3/21/2014