unsaid

​unsaid

alone here
fresh from a bath
soak away my restless thoughts
and pour myself a cool glass of wine
I think of words
said
unsaid
and the trails of you
my mind follows through
the paths back to your smile
and a few kind words
a road my mind knows
oh... all to well
and you are not real.
I knew that all along
but wanted to believe
somewhere
someone was different from the others
what a silly expectation that turned out to be
a sip of my drink
and I know that I'll think
even less about you
tomorrow than I did today
and that is
the only way
I'll get through this
without feeling
utterly hurt and foolish
it was only words after all
as pretty as they seamed
and then... well ~ perhaps a few reckless dreams
and some pictures that made me a little weak in the knees
but there was no voice
no touch ~ no kiss
no proof that you actually do exist
and tomorrow I'm sure
that I will miss
you less than I do tonight
yah I'll be I'll right
let me just tell myself this one more time
and I won't feel so hurt and foolish
forgotten
unwanted
out of your sight and completely out of your mind

just know it was never what you said that hurt me
but all that you did not say
and the knowing that you never will.


tell me how you move on so easily
without thinking of me please
I need some clues
give me the keys
to the way you let go so carelessy
I want to be indifferent
unspent
thoughtless
 and well...more like you
if only to hurt a little less
over this silly mess
of emotions
I let myself
get tangled up inside
not even quite sure why
it's not as if I love
 just anyone...
so just tell me now
how to recover
think of some other
move on
and not let my mind wander
back to you...
tell me please
give the keys
to how you move on
with such careless ease
I want to be thoughtless
unspent, indifferent
and well...
 a little more like you
so I can hurt
a little bit less than I do.