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Let's just love Let's just breathe Let's just exist. What the fuck are we are all so worked up about? I never meant to take it all so serious I remember when I Was simply laughing by your side. Some connections Are immediate And for always. Just because a fire burns fast Does not mean That it will die. Some conversations Tilt the axis of the universe And nothing Remains Quite the same After that. So let's just laugh Let's just be free Let's just exist What the fuck are we are all so worked up about any way? Did I mention I adore this human experience Even though I don't Have a clue What the hell I'm doing From day to day. Some connections Are immediate And for always. Just because a fire burns fast Does not mean It will burn out. Some conversations Tilt the axis of the universe And nothing Remains Quite the same After that. Charity 
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wine and music
recollections old affections what's your story what's your story now I used to know a bit of it and you knew mine but did you know how you got me no one ever came so close to understanding the madness energy and art that I hold in this restless, sacred, ancient heart why did I come like this back to this realm again if not for us? I know I said that I meant to try this one human life on my own but fuck I miss you damnit I miss you by my side I'm so over so goddamn over being alone every day each night I know I said I wanted to try this this one single human life alone but I was wrong damnit I was wrong it's better with you It was always better with you every lifetime better with you... I'm not ashamed to admit I've got this present life to live and I want you in it I want you in it. goddamn how I want you in it. blue eyes and ancient ties look deep enough you'll realize your dark eyes were meant to stare right in to mine want to lose myself in your darkness again it grounds me surrounds me frees me if you need me still I'm here. Charity You know this about me
I'm so stubborn strong willed and too damn independent for my own good and I wanted to believe I did not need your presence with me but I know you're here somewhere in this world I can feel you (I always could) I told you I'd be okay But you came along anyway you followed me through the void when I chose this partiular form and dove down in to the world of men you came along always so protective and I said I didn't need that but you came along anyway even though this particular realm has never been your favorite place. you know that I love it and so you came along anyway. I can feel you here Although I don't know exactly who or where you are I miss us I really did love being one. having someone to turn to a hand to hold a soul that understands my soul. and I said I wanted try this one life alone but you're out there this I know. And I can tell you now in an honest, quiet voice I've had my fill of this life alone. and I'm so stubborn so damn stubborn this we both know but I'm ready to say I'd rather spend my nigts and days with you. Charity I was meant to Follow you into the night I know that. I was meant to dive deep into the depths of the blackness And bring you light (In a moment when not a damn thing in your life felt right) I was meant to reach for you I was meant to touch your face I was meant to meet your eyes And bring you back from that far off place ~ But how? Tell me how (If possible Tell me Now.) I was meant to dive all The way down Into the worst Of the curse with you. And bring you back truly alive. And willing to give Something more than mere survival a try. I was meant to wake you I was meant to take you Home. With me. I think... Or were you the one meant to return for me for me? (Humanity makes it so easy to forget) We had it all sorted out Before we left the other side... To enter this space, this time. So clear So fearless So right. And now here I stand Flesh, blood, thought and forgetting Was I meant to be the one searching Or to be the one waiting? And so Unsure I wait. Hating the passage of time With your lips So far from mine And yet if I follow you Into your night Would I also be here, still waiting When You arrive? Charity Janisse  Closure Completion some semblance of reason release, forgiveness Forgetting (no) we live this happy ever never after winding road to tears and laughter here there (he's no where near) we are silence in the summer the night is heat we're under cover from the street sky is yellow and I address this loneliness with a list of useless lines on a useless screen in a useless poem about a useless dream that I woke from when I had meant to keep sleep sleep sleeping in. Charity  Closer than we ever were Further now Tho I feel you near If you knew would you return Or have you always been right here? Charity  When she falls She falls Like waterfalls Crashing into the sea Beneath She's Niagara to me Fierce Rushing Dangerous And Lovely ~ When she falls. Charity  Do what you have to do Leave who you have to leave Even if it's me again... Even if I seem to leave too I never left you. I've always known you I've loved you Without explanation Cut me loose Set me free Break your chains And let me be It hardly matters My connection remains. Love who you love Hate who you hate I can't help but wait Even if I am waiting for nothing It is still something To feel this connection ... Your eyes. What is it About those eyes...? I know them I remember you From the time before always Outside of now Moments uncharted. I remember. Past and future Before always and ever Long after forever I remember Your eyes (And there's nothing I can do about that.) {And there's nothing that I want to.} I love you. Before always And after forever You. charity  There are words others use for people like us and some of them are not kind; crazy mad solitary delusional tragic... what have you who cares. I embrace them I claim them I love them. You have to understand that just because we see the world differently than you do and perhaps have seen more enchantment and tragedy in our unusual lives than others have seen in their many peaceful years there is nothing more right or wrong with any of us than there is with anyone else. The world is different than people think there are hidden lights shadows and mysteries we remember them we see them when others forget or cannot that is all. And we write those mysteries we paint those thoughts unseen we create music from tunes we hear and feel but could never quite explain any other way and we share our world with you. And you love it you do you love our vision our passion our "weirdness" our "madness" While you shake your head at our tragic lives of "solitude" "confusion" "hard living" and "seclusion" the truth is that madness that loneliness that can never be relieved not by any amount of company it paints the paintings you see it writes the stories you read It creates every note in the songs that you love and every line that you'll sing time and again. And they say of us what a shame they are so talented and yet they never could quite fit in so troubled so tragic their story is. But that is why we create the exquisite things we do; If we ever for one minute fit into your world we would never be desperate enough to write our stories paint our pictures play our songs and attempt to share the world we see with you. Charity 2014  |
Charity JanissePoems I've written over the course of my life and recently. Archives
January 2022
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